Potpourri

This rumor has been circulating since the Pens and Sabres played in the ice bowl in NY (ed-don't read past the third comment, as i did. As a rule, every post that mentions a team from Philly and a team from Pitt degenerates the reader on average in 4 comments. Just thought i would give you the heads up).

Personally, I think this move would show some extreme chutzpah by Bettman, considering offers are out there right now from NY, Chicago, etc. While PSU could set the record for the largest crowd at a hockey game, I could foresee the NHL going where the money is. State College is, after all, State College.

If it did happen, you could bet Cindy Crosby's vag that I would be there (ed-SEE?), wielding my ancient Rick Tocchet orange-road jersey.

In all seriousness, the Pitt team that ousted the Flyers was not the same team they faced back in March/April. Crosby didn't dive or complain, and routinely scared the bejeezus out of me with his preternatural passing ability. They looked like the Devils from ten years ago, but with more talent up front.

The question is, who to cheer for in the finals? Most Pens fans greatly infuriate me, and I am sure the corollary is very true. Still, the majority of the Pens fans I know personally keep it nice-no screaming incoherently, and they know a good deal about the sport. Except Zac, because he is a dick. He once told his mother to "Shut up or I'll spin kick you".

Then there is Detroit. Reports from Detroit were shocking to say the least-most games did not sell out at the Joe this year. Strange. I guess they better get an iron and lift the "Hockeytown" banner from the ice, which is kind of how they remove tattoos in prison. Maybe these aren't the same fans who once rode a Red Wing Zamboni all the way to Philly back in '97.

I'm going to have to go with Pitt on this one. Why?

1. I can only jinx them with my Philly mojo.
2. I can secretly live vicariously through my friends' championships.

Either way, someone wins.

My First Trip to Erie

Sweet Joepa's prostate, what a weekend. Very intense. And by that, I mean my brain was so booze-rattled and culture shocked, that I finally awoke this morning. Let's see...

Thursday

Left work around 1 for Pittsburgh, and was informed that coach Paterno was in the hospital due to heart attack. Thoughts of diverting from Pitt to State College were creeping into my mind. Luckily, the reports were a bit overstated, and I didn't have to alter my route. Yes, I am that selfish.

Arrived in Pitt around 6ish, only to be surprised by the amount of homeless people donning Penguin attire. Freaky. I also noted that Pitt looks much better in the fall. I don't know why. Maybe it's because the weather was ultimately shitty on Thursday.

Met up with my friend Frank-he's an old pledge buddy of mine and a huge Pens fan. As in even when attendance was pitiful, he still went to all the games he could. I respect that. Went to a bar that had Yeungling on special (weird, eh? Pens vs. Flyers, in Pitt, and they went with the Eastern PA beer) for $2.

Figure 1-1: Sweet Nectar of the Gods

AHHHHHHHH-gotta wash that road dust down, and the family Yeungling's incredible panacea eased all tension out of me (Note to self: Yeungling always tastes better in PA). That, and from living in DC, I forgot what real wings taste like. Thanks, Quaker Steak. Things were good all around.

Enter the Flyers game-nobody at the bar but me really saw Lupul's shot go in. Not that I blame the Pitt fans. Fleury just hasn't let in anything from over 15 feet this series. Let's just say the room quieted noticeably when I stood up and cheered. And then someone tried to hit me with a broom.

So I pretty much watch the game chain-smoking, just praying we can at least win one to gain some shred of dignity back within the organization, all whilst talking among those laid-back country folk. Good people. Flyers win, I'm drunk and happy, and go to pass out over Frank's place watching Red Dawn. Missed the infamous "AVENGE MEEEEE!" line (see below), but still, it's Red Dawn.

Figure 1-2: Damn, I miss the commie-fear of the 80's

Friday
Left Pittsburgh around 9AM for 120 miles on route 79 toward Erie. Holy tits, there is nothing out there.

I get into Erie around 11, get my bearings (the town is surprisingly intuitive in layout), and treat myself to an incredible breakfast at some joint called Butch's after witnessing the awesome size of McDowell high school. Excellent food, great coffee, and cheap. Spent the afternoon among friends and their new kid, as well as taking the tour of the town. The weather seemed to hold up.

What do I think of Erie? Well, everywhere north of the amusement park is unique. Looks like solid fishing/campgrounds. The back roads remind me alot of the State College, or Lehigh areas. The only criticism here was the lack of street signs. However, the main drags remind me of Jersey. Tons of liquor stores and distributors, and the roads are in incredibly poor shape due to the temperature extremes that are imparted on the town. And cheap floozies everywhere.

Back to the Liquor. I have never seen prices so cheap. 6 hours of consuming, and I only spent 30 dollars. At one place, my tab included 1 Redbull and vodka, 4 vodka tonics, and 5 beers. The total? 23 dollars. Using beer math, this would equate to somewhere around $70-$80 in DC. So you see, I had to keep drinking.

Erie 1 Me 0

Saturday
I have never missed a tee time in my life-I may have been a smidge tardy once or twice, but I have never slept clean through one. First time for everything, I guess. Regardless, I rallied to get there for the back 9, and actually postponed my hangover 'till after lunch. It was at that time, I collapsed and detoxed. Kind of felt like this:

Fig. 1-3: Never has heroin been so awesome

Ok, a slight exaggeration maybe, but you get the point. Erie was in my veins and trying to rip me apart with its madness.

Saturday night, we all go to this Italian drinking club called the Aurora Nova. Lots of Italians. Zac over at EIFL did an excellent report on the goings on; especially when it comes to Asians and gaming.

Speaking of non-hetero Asians, Rob once again brought the house down in karaoke at the bar we went to.

I did well-no blackouts were awarded to me, so I didn't forget Asian Rob dancing on a table at the club to Whitney Houston with a 60 year old.

Erie 1 Me 1

Sunday

I was told I woke up around 10, left at 11, and got home by 530 that afternoon.

Sunday was kind of a blur of farms, interstates, tolls, and apparently, one Penguins goal after another.

Final Thoughts

I am definately going back, preferably sometime in the summer or fall. I just hope I realize that I need to take Monday off next time.